The Rangers’ most recent acquisitions.

In an effort to cut costs and bolster their injury-depleted bullpen, the Texas Rangers have begun hiring day laborers to complete their 25-man roster.

“It started out, we were just looking for guys to repaint the baselines”, said Rangers GM Jon Daniels. “Then we thought, ‘We’re already paying them for a whole day, why not?’”

The newly employed day-laborers have embraced their new duties, as Home Depot parking lots across DFW have become increasingly crowded with unskilled workers hoping to be discovered.

“I never saw it coming. But it’s definitely better than cleaning out septic tanks or laying grout” said Eddie Guardado, who has been offered a ten day contract worth $60.

Surprisingly, the Rangers’ pitching statistics have only marginally suffered since the change in scouting tactics, although they have touted one of the worst ERA’s in baseball for nearly a decade. The drop in performance, though, is worth the millions the club is saving on real baseball players, according to owner Tom Hicks: “I’m just trying to cut my losses.”

But the opportunity to play in the big leagues for a day isn’t the only perk these workers have been enjoying. As one player recounted, “It was even Dollar Dog night, so I could almost afford to feed my whole family that day.”

Questions have been raised by the Players’ Association as to whether the new arrangement violates the current collective bargaining agreement.

Said Players’ Association executive director Don Fehr, “They’re taking American League jobs! Just because they’ll do the same job for one millionth the wage doesn’t make it right.”